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T.A.P.T.


Apr 7, 2020

In this week's episode, we tackle the unpredictable world of online dating. Listen as we discuss how the online dating process has worked for us, our use of various apps and websites and how to use creativity and clinical skills to your advantage. Dive in as we explore the pros and cons of online dating and how factors such as age, geography, race and culture, and of course, being a therapist, impact our experiences.

Key takeaways from this episode include:

1. The act of dating is not synonymous with a committed relationship. Know and understand your “dealbreakers” and how you personally define the act of dating. Directly communicate with anyone that you are interested in and that you are spending time with. You both need to be on the same page.

2. You still need to have great basic social skills (i.e. verbal communication, personal space and boundaries, respect, impulse control, etc.) to engage in online dating. It is still a prerequisite for being intentional, engaging and maintaining a relationship with someone else.

3. Say what you mean and mean what you say from the beginning. Put it in your profile even if that one sentence says “looking for a committed and healthy relationship. Please only serious inquires.” After all, we are applying for a coveted position as a “partner” in someone else’s life.

4. The pickings are slim so should we really be swiping right? Is it a numbers game or simply just for hookups? Think more broadly, be open and get creative. You can meet people on other forms of social media other than specific online apps that have the same intention as you.

5. Assessment, assessment, assessment. Being a therapist has its own strengths and challenges while dating. Keep your eyes and ears open and use your clinical skills to filter out the bad seeds and the red flags and do not make allowances for them.

6. Yes. Tonika is literally in the closet and recording the podcast and show every week lol!!!!

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